North Koreans Don’t Want War - Just A Regular Sex Life

North Koreans may have nukes, but there’s one thing they don’t have.

Condoms.

That’s right. The hermit nation has enacted a policy to breed more loyal citizens and banned birth control. However, in practice this doesn’t really work as most families in North Korea still only have one child—mainly due to the high cost of education (and low income) in the country.

Condoms though, have become one of the most sought-after items in North Korea today—and a huge black market has developed with smugglers sneaking them into country.

You won’t find locally-made condoms either—manufacture is prohibited. 

It’s difficult to believe, but most North Koreans don’t even know what a condom is.

Yet, if there’s a dollar to be made, humans (of any nationality) will find a way to make it, and that’s exactly what government officials and businessmen traveling to next door China do—stashing screeds of condoms in suitcases for the return trip. Searches can take place at borders, so even they are taking a huge risk.

The end result of this lack of condoms is a serious health problem. Speaking to Radio Free Asia, a Chinese businessman living in Pyongyang said that widespread prostitution in North Korea has made the use of condoms vital. The risk of pregnancy and the spread of sexual diseases among prostitutes and the general population is high. “North Korean executives are aware of this reality, but the North Korean government insists there is no prostitution in the country.”

No one is likely to raise this issue with the “supreme leader” and face a labor camp or worse, so the free market in the form of smugglers and a widespread black market in steps in to fill the safe sex gap when government fails.

It’s not the only thing you can’t buy in North Korea. 

McDonalds and Coca-Cola are persona non grata. Okay, perhaps that’s not a bad thing as the result is obesity levels lower than Western countries. But you can be pretty sure someone is smuggling Kim Jong-un a truck-load of Big Macs, Whoppers and supersized coke.

Along with condoms, modern tampons aren’t available in Korean shops. It’s horrifying to think that North Korean women of all ages still have to use regular fabric, which they wash and reuse again and again.

Oh there’s something else you can’t buy in North Korea. A decent haircut. In local salons men and women have photos of half a dozen or so “approved” styles. The most favorite for men being the Kim Jong-un special. Meaning most guys look like a badly shorn sheep.

Still, maybe condoms aren’t so important. Plastering poster everywhere of a pudgy dude wearing possibly the worst haircut ever—is a sure libido killer for everyone.

If you’re looking for a huge selection on condoms—then thank your lucky stars you don’t live in North Korea!

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Good luck comrade—find the right condom for you!